Easter: A Celebration of God’s Self-Giving Love and Beauty!

In Consumption, Delight in God, Desire, Discipleship, Easter, Formation, Freedom, Love by BizgaineyLeave a Comment

Easter: A Celebration of God’s Self-Giving Love and Beauty!

Are there ever moments in your life when your desire feels ravenous?

Moments when you are just never satisfied, always longing for, wanting, or craving bigger, better, more?

I use the term ravenous to mean intensely eager for satisfaction or gratification.  I have written extensively on this blog regarding the prevalence of desire within the human soul.

We can all probably agree, at least on some level, that many of our decisions related to how we spend our time and where …
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Do You Remember When?

In Contemplation, Formation, Freedom, Fully Awake, Habits, Spiritual Formation by BizgaineyLeave a Comment

I concluded last week’s blog with the following question:

Do you remember when you last felt the Word of Christ dwelling richly in you?

Now, before you read further, pause and identify that moment or those moments when you recall sensing the deep indwelling of the presence of Christ in your life.

We never seem to have enough money, time, sleep, coffee, joy, love, etc.

We all – at times – complain about our lack of resources.  We decry our lack of time and we sulk when we see others …
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Christmas Morning: Opening the Gift of a Porn-Free Life!

In Addictions, Christmas, Consumption, Formation, Freedom, Freedom from Porn, Marriage, Men Against Porn, Pornography by BizgaineyLeave a Comment

The Christmas season is one of gift-giving and receiving.  In all likelihood you will, on Christmas morning, celebrate this gift-exchange tradition with friends and family.  You may gather around a tree, in a living room, near a fireplace, etc. and open gifts shared by those who love you and those whom you love.

If you happen to be struggling with your porn addiction during this season, you’ll likely be disengaged from this life-giving moment.

You may, in fact, totally check out.

Indeed, if you’ve been trolling the web for porn …
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Does One Bad Moment Make Me a Monster?

In Addictions, Brokenness, Formation, Freedom, Freedom from Porn, Habits, Pornography, Technology by BizgaineyLeave a Comment

During the early days of my journey out of porn addiction, I remember a time when I had been porn-free for about 90 days (yes, I numbered freedom by days, not months).  It was, at that time, the longest I had ever gone without clicking a website, watching a video, or trying to get porn in any form I could.

Then one day I crashed, badly.  All the signs were there; I just didn’t see them.  Either that or I simply refused to take note of them.

The triggers were:…
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Beholding True Beauty! Traps and Triggers, Part 4.

In Addictions, Culture, Freedom, Freedom from Porn, Men Against Porn, Pornography by BizgaineyLeave a Comment

Triggers and Traps: The Trap Day

I know the term Trap Day is an unfamiliar one.  It is, in fact, not one I have heard of anywhere else.  That’s because it’s one that is birthed from my personal journey out of porn addiction and into a porn-free life.  In my experience the Trap Day is a day of ongoing struggle with porn’s pull.  It’s a day when one is particularly susceptible to porn and its destructive power of persuasion.

The Trap Day is as unexpected as it is unavoidable.

The …
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Recognizing Triggers and Traps, Part 3.

In Addictions, Formation, Freedom, Freedom from Porn, Men Against Porn, Pornography by BizgaineyLeave a Comment

Triggers and Traps: The Tempting Situation

As I write this post on preparing for and resisting The Tempting Situation, I am sitting in a Starbucks drinking my customary Grande Bold Coffee, black.

Here is what I can tell you based on this one morning in Starbucks: For those of us who are trying to live a porn-free life, or who are trying to maintain a porn-free life, temptations abound, and they are everywhere.

We will, at some point, be tempted or face a Tempting Situation, in which our …
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With Desire So Demanding, Why is God So Distant?

In Desire, Discipleship, Formation, Freedom, Fully Awake, Purpose and Meaning, Spiritual Formation, Surrender by Bizgainey1 Comment

The first month of a new year is often a time of expectancy and hope. The onset of the new year typically provides a few weeks during which we celebrate the goodness of God, the faithful promise keeper! We carry with us new visions of satisfaction; replacing yesterday’s memories of despair and hunger. Indeed, we hope – at least in some measure – to discover satisfaction and fulfillment in the year ahead. That’s why I have spent the bulk of January reflecting on the nature and nurture of soul satisfying …
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The United States of Uncle Rico (A Repost)

In Brokenness, Culture, Football, Freedom, Purpose and Meaning, Uncategorized by Bizgainey3 Comments

**The following post is a ‘redraft’ of an earlier version that appears on  http://theshapeofdesire.blogspot.com/ where I currently feature poetry and the poetic form.   I hope to begin a mini series – with Melissa next week – on Porn, Power Narratives and the Promise of Lasting Change.  The series will contain the ways in which we have leaned upon the grace of God to live into His freedom and relied upon the love of each other in the good and the bad. Stay tuned !  Until then, enjoy this older post!**…
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A Few Simple Ways Any Parent Can Minimize the Impact of Porn!

In Addictions, Christian Leadership, Freedom, Habits, Parenting, Pornography, Purpose and Meaning, Uncategorized by Bizgainey2 Comments

Tired of porn ruling your world, running your emotions, wrecking your home?

Tired of addiction consuming you, your spouse, your kids, your friends, and neighbors?

In this and the next few posts – I am going to outline a few simple ways any parent/person can minimize the impact of porn!

I am not offering boundaries or a list of protective measures one might take in this effort. Establishing boundaries and developing guidelines for technology usage is crucial. I have made those suggestions elsewhere on this blog.

These posts will dig …
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Distorted Desires and the Rhythms of Grace!

In Formation, Freedom, Marriage, Purpose and Meaning, Uncategorized by BizgaineyLeave a Comment

“I have been, madam, a wicked creature, as you and all flesh and blood are.” –Shakespeare

These words of Shakespeare sound like the Hebrew prophet, Jeremiah, who said, “The human heart is the most deceitful of all things, and desperately wicked. Who knows how bad it is?”

Our desires – in and of themselves – are not bad, sinful or unnatural.  They are God-given and, when aimed toward God, they produce amazing outcomes. I believe, for example that all of humanity share at least three fundamental desires,

The Desire for
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